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sweet and luscious life

June 11, 2008

tulips

It’s hard to believe that my old blog, the one that saw me through the worst year of my life, went up in cyber flames. Gone forever, never to be recovered, save for the last backup I did in March 2007 when I was just a blogging virgin. Nota bene: protect yourself and do regular backups because it could happen to you.

Oh! I could go into detail about how my webhost lost many, many of their client databases, devoured by some hungry internet monster, but the conclusion would be the same and I would have bored you in the process. The conclusion is this: it saddens me so deeply to see a whole year of writing and hard work (need I say Nablopomo?), creativity and kind comments gone… and by sad, I mean royally pissed off! Expletive! Expletive! Expletive!

But then, it couldn’t be more fitting that the Universe would erase the shitty year of ’07.  Perhaps as a reminder to live in the now? How’s that for closure? Indeed, if there is anything this past year has taught me, it’s that life is ephemeral and you never really know what is waiting for you around the corner (good or bad). To live anywhere in the recent past or soon to come future means missing out on all the wonder that is happening around us now… the thrilling experience of being… this one sweet and luscious life.

And with that single thought, I turned my heals on my old blog and started a new one. If the ache of being away from Bohemian Creations for the past couple months was any indication of how this writing space fed me (I was undergoing slow creativity starvation), a new blog was in order and I am excited to begin this journey again, on the day of my 33rd birthday. The perfect preface to a new chapter, a new year, a new life.

Coming up with a name for this new place was hard, kids. Like naming a child or a pet or writing a bio. I initially wanted to christen it Be Here Now because that is the thought, which led me to begin anew. Alas, that name was taken.

I also thought of Sans Parapluie (without an umbrella) because as I was walking to work yesterday, it started pouring out of the blue (quite literally) and there I was all primped and proper, with no umbrella and a 7 minute walk ahead of me. As people ran past me with newspapers over their heads in an attempt to escape this connection to nature, I just kept walking through it, under it, beside it, with much enjoyment I might add.   I just didn’t care that my hair would be a pile of frizz on my head, that my pant legs would be wet, that I would smell like rain. I had been caught without an umbrella… and it seemed like a perfect metaphor for life.

You can’t always control or prepare for everything. I agree that one can watch the weather reports and carry an umbrella…. but dammit, sometimes you just have to wait and see, sometimes you need to get a little wet and uncomfortable in order to experience something new, sometimes you just have to take life as it comes, without resistance, without planning, without judging. Because when you always try to control the outcome, you’re left with very little room for spontaneity and surprises and growth. And even if growth spurts hurt, I’m all about the growth people.  Sans Parapluie… nice ring to it, wouldn’t you say?

But in the end, I settled on Wonderings and Wanderings. Partially because I recently bought my dream camera (told you I would) and I’ve been wandering the streets of Montreal ever since, seemingly aimlessly but ever present… full of wonder at all the beauty around me. And ultimately, that’s what I’ve been doing for years, roaming this country and letting my mind wander and my heart marvel. That’s just how I do.  Also, I have to admit that I like the softness of two Ws side by side.

These new digs are a little bare right now… the place definitely needs some sprucing up. I’m thinking a few links to my favorite sites in the sidebar, a Flickr widget, a splash of color, some ear candy, a little dusting, hang some photos and a new banner on the wall, pull the curtains and blinds to let the light in… and soon, this too will feel like home.

I do hope you will all find your way back to me after such a long absence. The door to this place is always open if you want to pop in and say hello. I may be out taking my camera and my soul for a walk but I’ll be back to share my findings and I hope to meet you here.

The things you own end up owning you.  It’s only after you lose everything that you’re free to do anything.”  ~ Fight Club

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21 Comments leave one →
  1. June 12, 2008 4:50 pm

    You have no idea how glad I am to see you here 🙂

  2. Michelle Caron permalink
    June 12, 2008 5:24 pm

    What a great birthday gift to give yourself! Congrats and welcome back!

    I like the name, it suits you!

  3. Frannie permalink
    June 13, 2008 12:40 am

    So glad to see you up and running again. I’ve been missing you in cyberland and in real life, too. I LOVE that you got that camera!

  4. Shawn permalink
    June 13, 2008 2:32 am

    I’m so happy you’re back on the scene with a gangster lean… what?

  5. Alison permalink
    June 13, 2008 10:28 am

    Yay! Yay! Yay! Thanks for coming back to us via blog land. You’ve been dreadfully missed. I love your very first introduction and you’ve chosen a beautiful name. Now I’ve got one more great thing to look forward to. Hopefully often. So good to have you back. 🙂 🙂 🙂

  6. June 13, 2008 5:18 pm

    hello hello hello hello

    GOD.

    I missed you— thank god you’re back.

  7. amystery permalink
    June 13, 2008 7:11 pm

    Hoorah happy belated birthday and brand spankin’ new blog birthday! Glad to see you back!

  8. June 13, 2008 7:13 pm

    happy birthday : ) welcome back to blog land, you new home is beautiful! xo

  9. June 13, 2008 7:19 pm

    There you are. I was worried *you* took it down …but to know it imploded all on it’s own is sad. I have never backed up my blog (going on 4 years now) and honestly your post gives me pause…to back up or not? I don’t even go back and read old posts. Hmm..something I need to ponder a bit more. Glad to know you’re out there again. I’ll fix my link ASAP. 🙂

  10. lunacyn permalink
    June 13, 2008 8:04 pm

    Happy belated birthday lady! I love the new name. I also love “sans parapluie”. It reminds me of a passage from “Another Roadside Attraction”, by Tom Robbins.

    “The sky was still blue, the sun still beaming when they locked me up. But during my incarceration it had begun to rain. The legendary Seattle rain. It was a thin gray rain; hard and fast and cold. In it, we had to walk four blocks from the Public Safety Building to the Ziller’s jeep–we were at its mercy. As was my custom in such elements I hunkered against the rain, drew my head into my collar, turned my eyes to the street, tensed my footsteps and proceeded in misery. But my hosts, I soon noticed, reacted in quite another way. They strolled calmly and smoothly, their bodies perfectly relaxed. They did not hunch away from the rain but rather glided through it. They directed their faces to it and did not flinch as it drummed their cheeks. They almost reveled in it. Somehow, I found this significant. The Zillers accepted the rain. They were not at odds with it, they did not deny it or combat it’ they accepted it and went with it in harmony and ease. I tried it myself. I relaxed my neck and shoulders and turned my gaze into the wet. I let it do to me what it would. Of course, it was not trying to do anything to me. What a silly notion. It was simply falling as rain should, and I a man, another phenomenon of nature, was sharing the space in which it fell. It was much better regarding it that way. I got no wetter than I would have otherwise, and if I did not actually enjoy the wetting, at least I was free of my tension. I could even smile. What I smiled at was the realization that I had been in the Ziller’s company less than fifteen minutes and already their example had altered my behavior. Surely, I was on the right track.”

    Sorry for the long quote. Your words, like Tom Robbins’, continue to inspire me to grow and be true to myself and nature. So glad to have you back. 🙂

  11. June 13, 2008 8:12 pm

    Please accept this welcome home present – a small Persian carpet to throw on your floor – filled with the intricate intertwining of memory. I remember pictures of your cat and flowers. Blue skies and a lovely picture of you under a white blossom tree.

    And words that make me smile and cry and feel more.

  12. June 13, 2008 8:43 pm

    Hooray for a new internet dwelling 🙂

  13. June 13, 2008 9:04 pm

    So glad you are here. Here’s to new beginnings.

  14. June 13, 2008 9:44 pm

    Welcome back sweet girl and Happy Birthday! I’ve missed you and wondered what happened to your website. I was thrilled to receive your email announcing your new digs. Bienvenue!

  15. Joe permalink
    June 13, 2008 9:58 pm

    Glad to see you back! Hope you enjoy your new camera. Looking forward to seeing your pictures. Quote from Tom Waits “I never buy umbrellas cuz there’s always one around”

    Take care, Love ya

  16. June 14, 2008 5:39 am

    Your new creation is starting out so beautifully. I trust it’ll be a rewarding venture for ALL.

  17. June 16, 2008 2:45 am

    I am saddened that you lost all of your beautiful work. Truly.

    Still, the fact that you are back makes up for it all. At least from where I’m sitting. I have missed your perspective, humor, wisdom, and insight.

    Welcome back, sweet J.

  18. June 17, 2008 8:32 pm

    Girl, you rock! Glad to see you back…

  19. Christina permalink
    June 25, 2008 3:58 pm

    Love the name, love the posts, love that you`re back.

    Shawn, you made me spit some of my lunch on the monitor with that comment…thanks! haha

  20. Joe Stewart permalink
    May 11, 2011 6:03 pm

    loving looking at your life before me and you!

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  1. day 3 - repeat performance « Wonderings & Wanderings

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